[Intro] 
G-Cadd9-D-Cadd9-G Where instead of people actually telling their stories,
you got a bunch of millionaire metrosexuals that have never done a hard day's work in their lives. [Verse 1] 
G A dirt road
Cadd9 A cold beer
D A blue jeans
Cadd9 A red pickup
GCadd9DCadd9 A rural noun, simple adjective
 
G No shoes
Cadd9 No shirt
D No Jews
Cadd9G You didn't hear that
Cadd9D Sort of a mental typo
 [Pre-Chorus] 
EmD I walk and talk like a field hand
GAm But the boots I'm wearing cost three grand
EmDCadd9 I write songs about riding tractors
DG From the comfort of a private jet
 [Chorus] 
GC I can sing in Mandarin
DAm And still know I'm pandering
EmD Hunting deer and chasing trout
CDG A Bud Light with the logo facing out
 
GC Hear that subtle mandolin
DAm That's textbook panderin'
EmDC I own a private ranch that I rarely use
D I don't like dirt
 [Spoken] 
GCadd9 One verse, one chorus in the bag
DCadd9 Now it's time to talk to the ladies
GCadd9DCadd9 I'm hoping my Southern charm offsets all these rape-y vibes I'm puttin' out
 [Verse 2] 
G Good girl
Cadd9 In a straw hat
DCadd9 With her arms out in a corn field
GCadd9 That is a scarecrow
DCadd9 Thought that was a human woman, sorry
 
G A cold night
Cadd9 A cold beer
D A cold jeans
Cadd9 Strike that last one
 
G I'm wanting you
Cadd9D I hope you're feeling me
 [Pre-Chorus] 
EmD We go to bed, you doze off
GAm So I take your country girl clothes off
EmD I put my hands on your body
Cadd9D It feels like hay, it's a fucking scarecrow again
 [Chorus] 
GC Like Mike's Evander-ing
DAm Fuck your ears, I'm pandering
EmD I write songs for the people who do
CD Jobs in the towns that I'd never move to
 
GC Legalize gerrymandering
DAm Tolerate my pandering
EmD You got a beautiful mouth
C I got a beautiful (dick)
 
N.C D Y'all dumb motherfuckers want a key change?
 
AD Thematically meandering
EBm Emphatically pandering
F#mE I got a tight grip on my demo's balls
DE Say the word "truck," they jizz in their overalls
 
AD You don't know what land you're in
EBm I'm in the land of pandering
F#mE And I'll be upfront
DEA