D Bm A G
D Bm A G Gm
[Verse 1]D Bm A G
Walking around, I've got no one to talk to
D Bm A G
There's everyone, and then there's just me
D Bm A G
If I could change, don't you think that I'd do it
D Bm A G
God only knows why he cursed me to be
Gm
a straight white male
[Bridge]Bm
I state my problems
F# G
other people roll their eyes
Bm
Three trips to the mall
F# G
and zero khakis in my size
Bm
I've never been the victim
F# G
of a random search for drugs
D Bm
But you can't say my life is easy
G A D
until you've walked a mile in my UGGs
[Chorus]G A D G A D
Straight white male, I know the road looks tough ahead
F#
The women want rights
Bm G
The gays want kids
Gm
Can't you just leave us alone?
And also, no, to the things you asked for
D Bm A G
D Bm A G Gm
[Verse 2]D Bm A G
Everyone thinks that I've got it easy
D Bm A G
Just 'cause it's true, doesn't mean that it's right
D Bm A G
So pull up a chair, and put down your pitchfork
D Bm A G
Give me a chance to show you what it's like
Gm
to be a straight white male
[Bridge 2]Bm
The churches never made me
F# G
Feel ashamed of who I am
Bm
But I get e-mails from Netflix
F# G
that g-mail doesn't mark as spam
Bm
My country's Constitution was
F# G
hand-written by my race
D Bm
But my wife bought me the brand new iPhone
G A D
with an iPod Touch's case (it doesn't fit that phone)
[Chorus]G A D G A D
Straight white male, I know the road looks tough ahead
F#
The women want rights
Bm G
The blacks want not to be called the blacks
Gm
Can't you just leave us alone?
F#
And also, no, to the things you asked for
Nooooooo
G F# Bm (x6)
[Chorus]G A D G A D
Straight white male, I know the road looks tough ahead
F#
The women want rights
Bm G
The African-Ameri-it doesn't work for the rhythm of this song
Gm
We used to have all the money and land
We still do but it's not as fun now
