[Intro]D - A - G - A
Where instead of people actually telling their stories,
you got a bunch of millionaire metrosexuals that have never done a hard day's work in their lives.
[Verse 1]D
A dirt road
A
A cold beer
G
A blue jeans
A
A red pickup
D A G A
A rural noun, simple adjective
D
No shoes
A
No shirt
G
No Jews
A D
You didn't hear that
A G
Sort of a mental typo
Bm A
I walk and talk like a field hand
G
But the boots I'm wearing cost three grand
Bm G
I write songs about riding tractors
A D
From the comfort of a private jet
[Chorus]D
I can sing in Mandarin
A
And still know I'm pandering
Bm
Hunting deer and chasing trout
G A D
A Bud Light with the logo facing out
D
Hear that subtle mandolin
A
That's textbook panderin'
Bm G
I own a private ranch that I rarely use
A
I don't like dirt
[Spoken]D A
One verse, one chorus in the bag
G
Now it's time to talk to the ladies
D A G A
I'm hoping my Southern charm offsets all these rape-y vibes I'm puttin' out
[Verse 2]D
Good girl
A
In a straw hat
G A
With her arms out in a corn field
D A
That is a scarecrow
G A
Thought that was a human woman, sorry
D
A cold night
A
A cold beer
G
A cold jeans
A
Strike that last one
D
I'm wanting you
A G
I hope you're feeling me
[Pre-Chorus]Bm A
We go to bed, you doze off
G
So I take your country girl clothes off
Bm
I put my hands on your body
G A
It feels like hay, it's a fucking scarecrow again
[Chorus]D
Like Mike's Evander-ing
A
Fuck your ears, I'm pandering
Bm
I write songs for the people who do
G A
Jobs in the towns that I'd never move to
D
Legalize gerrymandering
A
Tolerate my pandering
Bm
You got a beautiful mouth
G
I got a beautiful (dick)
E
Thematically meandering
B
Emphatically pandering
C#m
I got a tight grip on my demo's balls
A B
Say the word "truck," they jizz in their overalls
E
You don't know what land you're in
B
I'm in the land of pandering
C#m
And I'll be upfront
A B E
