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Lirik Lagu Ernie Questions His Existence - Sesame Street

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Ernie: "Hey Bert, it's--"Bert: "-Aak-Eek-Aak!--"Ernie: "--time for our checker game." (Ernie looks apologetic.)Bert: "Oh Ernie, you scared me! I thought you weren't here."Ernie: "Well maybe I'm not then."Bert: "What do you mean?"Ernie: "You're usually right about most things, Bert."Bert: (modest) "Welllllllll ..."Ernie: "And if you think I'm not here ... then maybe I'm not!"Bert: "Good! If you're not here, Ernie, then I can go back to reading my book."(Bert does go read for about two seconds, as Ernie starts to get worried.)Ernie: "But the question is ... If I'm not here ..."Bert: (to himself) "Oh no ..."Ernie: (worried) "... then ... Where Am I?"Bert: "It's going to be one of those days."(Ernie gets a pair of binoculars and looks out the window with them)Bert: "Ernie ... (irritated) Ernie, what are you doing?"Ernie: "I'm looking for me, Bert! (pause) I thought I might be out taking a walk on Sesame Street, but I don't see me anywhere. (pause) Then if I'm not out on Sesame Street ---- I must be Lost!!"Bert: "I don't believe this."Ernie: "I'm lost! (he's really upset by now) Out there, all alone, wandering through some spooky forest, or down some lonesome road ... This is terrible! (starts to cry) I'll never see me again!"Bert: "Ernie!"Ernie: (sniff) "I miss me!"Bert: "Ernie, will you stop that! Now, I can prove to you that You Are Here. Now, get our hand mirror. (Ernie picks it up.) Now, what's that?"Ernie: "Oh, it's a mirror."Bert: "No, no, I mean look inside!"Ernie: (looks in the mirror) "I see ... me, Bert! That's me in the mirror, Bert!"Bert: "Right! And if you see yourself in the mirror , that means--"Ernie: "That means I must be Here! Gee, thanks, Bert! (smiles at the reflection) I missed me! (Ernie then goes back to Bert, tapping him on the shoulder as before) Hey Bert. it's time--"Bert: "Aak-Eek-Aak!"Ernie: " ... for our checker game! I'm here!"Bert: (angry) "Ernie, we can not play checkers!"Ernie: "Why not, Bert? I'm here!"Bert: (angry) "That's right, you're here, Ernie! BUT I'M NOT!" (marches out and slams door, leaving Ernie rather surprised.)